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Old 03-10-2004, 08:39 PM   #1
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karburator's Avatar
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: Valencia, Spain
Posts: 171
KTR- Joke: Are you a FANSI driver?

I use to visit another forum and there we use the word FANSI to refer to that people who drives fast but extremly polite.

I've translated into english a text that gives a definition of a FANSI driver.
I suposse there are many mistakes but the original text was very hard to translate into english because uses lots of jargon. Well, in any case, this is a translation exercise for me

Enjoy it.

Are you a FANSI driver? Read this to discover it.

F.A.N.S.I: Acronym of “Fenómeno Andante No Sexualmente Identificado” [that we could translate into English as “Ro.Phe.N.S.I: Roving Phenomenon Non Sexually Identified”]. A FANSI is that person who has left the normal way of driving approaching to the definition of “virile driving” [which means “to drive as fast as you can”]. But don’t misunderstand this! A FANSI is not a mad driver. A FANSI is just… a FANSI.


When you hear this you may understand that anybody that enjoys driving fast is a FANSI. Not at all!! A FANSI is not a fast driver, not only an aggressive driver, not just a mad car lover. A FANSI (you must write it with capital letters) is the fastest, most aggressive, maddest driver.

A FANSI doesn’t get funny if his car doesn’t skid in each curve, is that guy nobody wants to ride with ‘cause you can feel your stomach shaking inside yourself and you have difficulties to breath –even to pray for mercy.

Several times FANSIES are accused of having their own highway code. That’s true! But it consists in not getting himself or other people into trouble. The genuine FANSI driver doesn’t need to drive over the road shoulders in each curve because he knows how to mark them correctly. He doesn’t need to pass other vehicles when it’s not allowed because he knows how to pass them fast and safely.

Don’t mistake a FANSI with any mad crazy irresponsible. FANSIES know their cars perfectly and take care of them as they were their own sons. […] The authentic FANSI knows his own limits and his machine’s ones.

When a FANSI changes the tyres then he realizes that he needs a new suspension, and when he changes the suspension then he needs better seats, and when he changes the seats… We could go on and on for ages.

When a FANSI drives through a curve and the tyres don’t cream, he thinks ‘I drove too slow through that curve’, but if he achieves, then he thinks ‘That was not enough’. In any case, my friend, if your tyres screamed as you wanted but somebody was faster than you in the same curve, you have to try more times to be -at least- as FANSI as the other driver.

After reading this most of you are thinking that you really are FANSI drivers, but you have to try a simple experiment to confirm that: leave your driving license over the dashboard in front of passenger’s seat and turn right as fast as you can. If your license flies in front of your eyes crashing with the driver’s window and remains there as stuck with glue YOU ARE A FANSI DRIVER.

And now tell me: do you FANSI?
>Supported by Happy Modem

It cannot be so difficult. The instruction manual will tell me which pedal is the 'velocitator' and which one is the... 'deceleratrix' (by Mr. C.M. Burns)
May God bless those who have nothing to say and, furthermore, they keep quiet (by someone)
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